Sleep Paralysis Pt. 2

It was bad, I can’t quite explain how bad. I was beyond scared, I was terrified to sleep, to not be able to move and sometimes feel something pressing on my whole body.

It all started with me staying up late to do something, I cannot even remember what it was–prolly watching korean drama and catching up on some episode.Something useless and pointless, but yeah.

I started to sleep late, wake up late and the cycle started. And then, that first night. The first time it happened, like all nights thereafter..I was fully alert, my mind was still conscious but my body had gone into REM sleep; meaning no motor functions, I could not move my legs my nose! nay, not even a finger twitched. I remember desperately wanting to move even a single muscle. I COULD NOT. It scared me so bad, I thought I had a stroke and was paralysed-It was bad.

 I started to feel suffocation while panic was rising in my chest and my mind raced, ‘Why can’t i move?? what’s happening??!!!!! 

And then i blacked out. I learnt later it was just my mind falling asleep too, finally. It felt like my mind was active for an eternity, but it was probably only 5 minutes at the most.

The scariest thing about being in that state is, for myself at least, being able to hear everything so so clearly, the fan, the cats in the neighbour’s yard, the cars driving along the road behind our house. It was so clear and yet, I could not move. My body had fallen asleep, and straight into REM at that.
Imagine while you’re in that state and a burglar comes in, and discusses with his fellow how to dispose of you and your family members. That was one of the horrible scenarios running in my mind those times and with enough experience of SP, you KNOW that the next state for your mind is REM, you cannot even jump back into consciousness to scare the burglars. You are lying there like a sitting duck, unable to do anything but knowing what is going to happen to you and everyone you love. A bit dramatic, but i am miss worst case scenario 😉 
I’ve tried crying myself out of that state. It does not work. All i get is: I wake up in the morning feeling like i cried in a dream. Except it wasn’t in a dream, not really, more like an awake dream ;(

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